Nearly every day I devote some time to writing imaginary blog posts in my head. Even if I don't get them online, part of me (the procrastinating part) is still mentally tallying points for effort. A couple of times a week, I actually pull up the site to post something, and end up staring at the blank page for a few minutes before giving up surfing the web "for inspiration."
The words just disappear. It's not so much writer's block as writer's ennui. When the time comes to actually type, I can't call up the words, and just feel completely defeated and don't even want to try. It's like being in high school again, and having to do a worksheet of parabolas without knowing the formulas; it's easier to give up. I should try to power through, but it's been a real struggle lately due to some external factors.
My treatise on "Beauty and the Beast" stories that also served as an apology to Jen for making her see "Beastly" with me? Gone. (I am really sorry, though. It was terrible, and for the life of me I can't understand why the NYT gave it three stars.)
Epistolary novels: Lazy, or brilliant? Gone.
Dialogue vs Description: What I like to read vs what I need to write. Gone.
Why I hate first person perspective. Gone.
The important of auto save, or how not to kill your dog when they jump on your keyboard and erase four pages of work. Gone. (Literally.)
Anyway, it's been a really rough past month at the office, and I've been feeling so drained lately, that it's been hard to get inspired to write anything. I definitely value our meetings a lot more; it's nice to decompress and have "me" time to relax and let the creativity flow. I'm hoping that as things settle down I'll be able to scrape out some more time to complete a few things, and get that sense of accomplishment that Jennifer has been feeling lately. I know it's out there, and getting the words down is a step in the right direction.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Saturday, March 26, 2011
It's a Hard Habit To Break
The benefit from coming from a large family is that I hear voices of judgement come from many different directions. Ultimately it is my sub-conscious quoting people I know and not a multiple personality disorder, although sometimes I think the latter would be less painful. Today my sub-conscious took on the life of my aunt singing the refrain, "21 days is a habit". She had the benefit of management training back in the 1970's, and remembers large amounts of information from those trainings. Sometimes I think she could host her own hybrid version of management trainings, if she had the interest.
So, 21 days is a habit. From her management days, my aunt learned that if you do something for 21 days, you are more likely to continue the practice. Most people quit something after the first couple of weeks. We've been doing the reverse book club for a couple of months now, and it has indeed become a habit. A great habit, like flossing my teeth or eating broccoli. It has become as much a part of my Saturday as doing laundry.
I seem to be in uncharted territory. I'm notorious for not finishing something I start. In my arts & crafts stage, this manifested itself in the form of a closet full of unfinished projects. In my organizational phase, it manifested itself in the form of a partially alphabetized spice rack. I am finishing things, and am working past the point where I normally give up. The sensation of accomplishing something purely for myself is powerful, and addicting.
Who knows what will be next? Maybe I'll start living out the messages of Dale Carnegie or Stephen Covey. I could become the human manifestation of self-help books. I could "Stop Worrying and Start Living". I could "Win Friends and Influence People". I could become a "Highly Effective Person" through living out "7 habits". Or, I could just continue to write and finish things and see where that road leads.
So, 21 days is a habit. From her management days, my aunt learned that if you do something for 21 days, you are more likely to continue the practice. Most people quit something after the first couple of weeks. We've been doing the reverse book club for a couple of months now, and it has indeed become a habit. A great habit, like flossing my teeth or eating broccoli. It has become as much a part of my Saturday as doing laundry.
I seem to be in uncharted territory. I'm notorious for not finishing something I start. In my arts & crafts stage, this manifested itself in the form of a closet full of unfinished projects. In my organizational phase, it manifested itself in the form of a partially alphabetized spice rack. I am finishing things, and am working past the point where I normally give up. The sensation of accomplishing something purely for myself is powerful, and addicting.
Who knows what will be next? Maybe I'll start living out the messages of Dale Carnegie or Stephen Covey. I could become the human manifestation of self-help books. I could "Stop Worrying and Start Living". I could "Win Friends and Influence People". I could become a "Highly Effective Person" through living out "7 habits". Or, I could just continue to write and finish things and see where that road leads.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Is a Picture Worth a Thousand Words?
In general, I'm a fast writer. A fast reader. A fast talker. And a lazy procrastinator. So, my writing projects in the past have typically fallen into one of two categories: 1. A paper due in under 24 hours, and 2. NaNoWriMo. In both cases, the goal is to write quickly and efficiently, and never look back, and it's always worked pretty well for me.
Now, though, I'm writing at a different pace, over a longer stretch of time, and my old habits don't work for me any more. Despite my detailed storyline and character notes, I find myself going back to read things I wrote weeks ago to ensure I'm getting little details correct, like the color of a character's eyes, the correct spelling of a last name, or if I designated a certain street as running north-south or east-west. It's a pain.
On Jennifer Crusie's blog, Argh Ink, she recommends making a collage to have a snapshot view of your story. Crusie gives a lot of great writing advice on her site, but the collage idea always seemed a little stupid to me until recently. I'm past the point in my life where popsicle sticks, poster paint, and pipe cleaners are a part of my daily existence. Now, though, I see the appeal.
To that end, I spent a few hours online this week gathering links to pictures and maps; things that are close to the way I am imagining my characters and scenes in my mind. I'm still not entirely on board the collage train, but I'm willing to put a few pennies on the tracks. Just having the links organized on my laptop in a virtual binder (until I figure out a better system) will be a big help. I'd love to be able to make a foam core model of my town, with little models of my characters that I can move around at will from scene-to-scene. My inner procrastinator knows, however, that while I could probably justify a full-scale diorama pretty convincely, it would just be a means of avoiding actual writing.
Now, though, I'm writing at a different pace, over a longer stretch of time, and my old habits don't work for me any more. Despite my detailed storyline and character notes, I find myself going back to read things I wrote weeks ago to ensure I'm getting little details correct, like the color of a character's eyes, the correct spelling of a last name, or if I designated a certain street as running north-south or east-west. It's a pain.
On Jennifer Crusie's blog, Argh Ink, she recommends making a collage to have a snapshot view of your story. Crusie gives a lot of great writing advice on her site, but the collage idea always seemed a little stupid to me until recently. I'm past the point in my life where popsicle sticks, poster paint, and pipe cleaners are a part of my daily existence. Now, though, I see the appeal.
To that end, I spent a few hours online this week gathering links to pictures and maps; things that are close to the way I am imagining my characters and scenes in my mind. I'm still not entirely on board the collage train, but I'm willing to put a few pennies on the tracks. Just having the links organized on my laptop in a virtual binder (until I figure out a better system) will be a big help. I'd love to be able to make a foam core model of my town, with little models of my characters that I can move around at will from scene-to-scene. My inner procrastinator knows, however, that while I could probably justify a full-scale diorama pretty convincely, it would just be a means of avoiding actual writing.
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