slacker

Nearly every day I devote some time to writing imaginary blog posts in my head. Even if I don't get them online, part of me (the procrastinating part) is still mentally tallying points for effort. A couple of times a week, I actually pull up the site to post something, and end up staring at the blank page for a few minutes before giving up surfing the web "for inspiration."

The words just disappear. It's not so much writer's block as writer's ennui. When the time comes to actually type, I can't call up the words, and just feel completely defeated and don't even want to try. It's like being in high school again, and having to do a worksheet of parabolas without knowing the formulas; it's easier to give up. I should try to power through, but it's been a real struggle lately due to some external factors.

My treatise on "Beauty and the Beast" stories that also served as an apology to Jen for making her see "Beastly" with me? Gone. (I am really sorry, though. It was terrible, and for the life of me I can't understand why the NYT gave it three stars.)

Epistolary novels: Lazy, or brilliant? Gone.

Dialogue vs Description: What I like to read vs what I need to write. Gone.

Why I hate first person perspective. Gone.

The important of auto save, or how not to kill your dog when they jump on your keyboard and erase four pages of work. Gone. (Literally.)

Anyway, it's been a really rough past month at the office, and I've been feeling so drained lately, that it's been hard to get inspired to write anything. I definitely value our meetings a lot more; it's nice to decompress and have "me" time to relax and let the creativity flow. I'm hoping that as things settle down I'll be able to scrape out some more time to complete a few things, and get that sense of accomplishment that Jennifer has been feeling lately. I know it's out there, and getting the words down is a step in the right direction.