Write what you know. I can't count how many times I've read that phrase. As overused as it is, there must be something to that piece of advice. I decided to follow it.
What is it that I know right now? I know how to fail at a marriage. I'm pretty damn good at it, actually. I've failed twice, which is above average. I don't mean that in a whole, "poor me" way. It just is. So, I am writing about that very thing.
Writing about something that is deeply personal is a little weird, though. I spend most of my time editorializing what I tell others. I could rant and rave about the same themes, but in the end it gets a little old. Instead I self edit what I say to others, as many people do. Everyone has a filter. Sometimes, that filter needs to be a little more robust. In writing a story, I am able to take off that filter and explore the thoughts that I dare not say out loud, for fear of sounding a little off my rocker. In writing, there is no judgement. I can explore themes of hurt or longing and not be labeled.
The experience has been freeing. In life, I tend to try to see things from another's perspective. I tend to compromise, which can be good, in the case of resolving a dispute. It can also be bad, in the case of compromising one's beliefs or happiness. By removing my filter and allowing myself to freedom to express what is mine alone, I have been able to see things clearly and achieve peace.
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